In this blog post, I will share what you can do when you’re feeling like an imposter in your business.
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Have you ever had that feeling that one day someone is going to find you out for being the fraud you think you are? There’s a name for it – It’s called Imposter Syndrome.
Having suffered imposter syndrome when I was in HR, I know what it feels like, and it ain’t so pretty! I was being questioned as to why I did things the way I did, and my crazy little brain took that to mean I wasn’t doing it right. With that beautiful thing called hindsight, I now realise it was just my assistant’s way of checking her learning as she was training to do what I do. She wanted to understand why certain things happened in certain ways.
I started to question every single thing I did though, worried I was making serious mistakes, and that people would ‘find me out’. I still suffer with it on occasion in my business but now I recognise it for what it is. So what can you do about it? Here’s 3 ways to get you started on feeling in control again if it’s something you’re struggling with.
- Recognise your achievements
How often do you sit down and notice how fabulous you are? If you’re an over-achiever, it’s likely you’ll move onto the next thing and the next without actually noticing all you’ve done.
Take one of my lovely friends for example. We hadn’t spoken for a while and she asked how things were going with my business. I told her that it’s going well, that I’ve been taking things a bit slower because we’re moving soon and that this year is all about maintaining my business, adding automation etc. She rightly challenged me on it, saying, “Umm, well I’ve seen you doing the Female Entrepreneur Association Bundle, written a book and lots of other things. You’ve just done two big things, not the usual twenty that you normally do.” Funny how people have a different perspective to you. When you’re an over-achiever, you just see yet another thing to achieve.
My story highlights how easy it is to forget what we have actually achieved. Maybe, like me, you recognise and celebrate your clients’ achievements, but when it comes to you, you’re onto the next thing quicker than the dust can settle, and the next, and the next. It’s so important to take time out to review how far you’ve come. I wrote a post and newsletter about this earlier this year. When you sit down to reflect on what you’ve achieved, you might be surprised at how far you’ve come.
If you’re constantly feeling like you’re a fraud, often it’s because you have forgotten to recognise your achievements.
- Get Curious
When your imposter syndrome shows up, get curious with it. Say to yourself things like:
- “I wonder what’s driving this feeling”
- “If I knew what had triggered it, what would it be?”
- “I wonder why I feel this way”
- “I wonder why this is showing up for me right now”
There will often be a trigger, understanding what the trigger is has really helped me.
Maybe you’re scrolling through your Facebook news feed and someone’s post pops up and you start to go into comparing their success to yours, or perhaps it’s that someone asked you a question that you didn’t feel qualified to answer.
The news feed thing is one that clients commonly tell me is a trigger for them. The thing is you may be doing what I call ‘comparing bananas to socks’, comparing yourself against someone that’s been in business for longer, has different experience to you, etc. Find out more about this in a post I dedicated to this topic of bananas and socks. https://www.rubymcguire.com/comparing-bananas-to-socks
- Become The Expert You Think You’re Not
If you’re really struggling with trusting who you are, then do all that you can to build up your confidence in what you do.
Learn everything you can about your chosen subject. If there’s a way that you can get confirmation that what you’re doing is great, then do that. This could be in the form of getting assessed for coaching/mentoring for example, or it might be as simple as tracking all of your testimonials and great feedback that you receive. You can then go through it and remind yourself that you’re on the right track.
You may make mistakes. You’re human! It’s all good.
Listen to what people tell you about your skill set. Yes, that little broken record might tell you that you’re not great, but are there really that many people out there telling you that you’re great for the sake of it? Really??? I implore you to check in on that. They’re not all going to be liars, but you might be lying to yourself.
I could go on and on about this subject, because having been through it I get how much it can disempower you and fill you with dread every single day that today is the day when you’re going to be found out. But honestly, it’s a sign of your success and there’s a lot more people out there with it than you think, so you’re not on your own!
It’s time to rid of that mindset monkey that’s telling you that you’re going to get found out. What if you get found out for being the amazing business owner that you are?
Call To Action: Write down a list of your achievements over the past 3-6 months, year, 5 years, and then, celebrate them.
Remember to check out my Visibility Quiz to find out whether you’re a Visibility Lady, Countess, Princess or Queen. If you’re a guy then please change the names to Lord, Count, Prince and King) Once you’ve got your score I’d love for you to come on over to my pinned post on my business page and tell me what score you got. There’s a chance to win a little prize each month.
Also, I would love to interview Ladies, Countesses, Princesses & Queens on my podcast show, Rock Your Fabulous Biz. I’ll be asking you all about what you do on visibility right now, what’s working for you, what’s not and where you’d like to be. If you’re interested then apply for your spot here – http://bit.ly/PodVisQuiz. In order for your application to be considered, you’ll need to have completed the quiz though as I’ll need to know what you’ve scored etc.
PS. You don’t need to be a Queen on your own. If you want support, check out my Straighten Your Crown Sessions here. More info in the show notes.