Welcome to day 28 of my 30 day Blogging Challenge – A series called From Zero Confidence To Feeling More Fabulous in 30 Days. If you missed Day One’s post you can read it here and can follow the series through from there. I’m going to be writing about confidence and each day sharing some tips for building your confidence slowly. The tools and hints/tips I’m sharing can be used for you or your coaching clients but for now I want you to focus on you. Building your confidence can have a great impact on your business and life. You will be amazed at what you can do when you feel more confident.
Yesterday I shared the day in the life of a people pleaser. Over the course of this series I’ve been sharing lots of hints and tips to help you boost your confidence, but I’m also a realist and let’s be honest life can be a bit of a roller coaster. Some days things go swimmingly and other times we have lessons to learn which can really dent our confidence. Sometimes they are really painful periods of time, but they all help to build our characters and help us to evolve into the people we are. As time passes we mostly, not always, understand why things happened the way they did.
Today I’d like to share 7 simple tips for being more resilient. We all have times when we have curve balls thrown at us. Having a few simple strategies up your sleeve can help.
1. Find the learnings
There is no failure – see it as feedback. Feedback that something’s not worked/working and needs to be changed. When you fail at something (because I doubt if it will be an if, you’re human) reflect and look for the learnings. Talk to others, sometimes you need to hear it from someone else, you’re too close to find the learnings and you just feel like everything’s gone/going wrong.
2. Practice gratitude
Sometimes things are going on that are so massive that you cannot find the positive. I’m thinking back to things in my own life, when someone really close to me died or my first marriage ended, for example. I’m all for seeing the positive in everything, but I think if someone had told me to think positive at those times in my life I might have decked them!
What I wish I’d known then, that I know now, is that the practice, of being grateful for what you do have, is immeasurable. In my examples had I been more grateful and focused on the amazing people still surrounding me, and precious memories, things might have been a tiny bit more bearable. I now practice gratitude daily and it’s such a beautiful thing to do. I encourage you to practice gratitude, wherever you are in life right now. Start a gratitude journal. When you go back through it over time you’ll be amazed at how fabulous life can be, if you just take time to notice it.
3. Get support
I’ve mentioned a few times in this series now about how important it is to have people around you that support, encourage and believe in you. When things aren’t going so well don’t bottle them up, share them with people you feel safe with. The old adage, ‘a problem shared is a problem halved’ can sometimes make a huge difference. It’s SO important to acknowledge how we feel.
4. Let it go
So many of us analyse our mistakes and dwell on them. Just this week I was having a conversation with a client who was holding onto something that happened last year. We talked about how she should celebrate what she did achieve at the time, despite her difficult circumstances. Learn what you can from it, give yourself permission for getting it wrong, or not being perfect, and let it go. You can read more about letting go in this post.
5. Don’t be a diva!
That applies to you whether you’re male or female! It’s so easy to over-react and have that whole dramatic sweep of the hand to the forehead thing going on! Accept it’s happened and deal with it logically and calmly. If you’re reeling from something that’s happened, step back. Sleep on it if you have to, don’t go in all guns blazing and over-react! Better to write that email as a draft and revisit it in the morning than to hit send and regret it!
6. Look after you!
Go back to this post as part of the series – Self-care is always important, but even more so when you’re having a challenging time.
7. Laugh at yourself
Sometimes you just need to have someone to laugh at you and with you (enter my bestie for that – I remember once I was being criticised unfairly for something and sharing it with her. She said, “So if I told you that you’ve got big ears, you’d believe me, would you?” Now if I take myself too seriously she just asks if I’ve got big ears. Gotta love friends that bring you down to earth!
So, I’ve shared 7 tips for building your resilience. Yes, there will be times when things are challenging, it’s how you deal with those challenges that count. By working on building your resilience, you will also start to boost your confidence because you’ll understand that despite whatever’s going on you can still have an element of control while things are chaotic.
Today’s task
Think of one thing you’re grateful for today and leave a comment below.
Want some added fun and support? Pop your info in the form below and you’ll get free access to my private Facebook group – Confidence Rocks for the duration of the challenge.
Ps – when you sign up you’ll get sent a link to the group page – you’ll need to request to join.
Before I go … Do you live in Newbury, Berkshire?
If you do come along to my new monthly Newbury networking/coaching group, Cappuccino Biz. I ran a pilot last week with a great group of local business owners and it was really good fun. We got into some great conversations about business. You can find all the details and testimonials here.
